Just an update

I am still struggling, but I am also still alive. Thank you all for your great advice. It is hard to ask for help from anyone, even our good Lord above. I feel week and broken and asking for help seems to just intensify that.

My oldest boy who is 10 was suspended from school for taking a Swiss army knife to school. It was not something I would have ever bought him, a gift from my wise brother (yes, the same one who took them shooting while he was drunk). Of course, in today’s day and age, the schools just can not take any kind of chances and he was facing expulsion. I wasn’t angry at them, I understand, I would have expected no less if another child showed my boy a knife. I was however dismayed at the thought of being expelled for two years. However, at the hearing, the principal stood up for him and said that he is a model student, that this is the last person she ever expected this from, and I think that went a long way. He returned to school today.

Of course, my youngest boy was suspended for today for scratching a little girl. He swears that it was an accident. That he was trying to lift her up on to the monkey bars like she asked. I didn’t talk to the school yet because I have been so busy, I figured it was only one day, so he could stay home with me.

Why have I been so busy? Well, I was sick, and then, battling the depression, I allowed myself to set my homework aside. I was not only caught up but ahead for a while, now I am barely able to make deadlines and I am feeling rushed and stressed over it. This weekend I am going to get ahead by a week if I can. On the plus side, I am doing incredibly well in all of my classes.

The van is going out on us. It is jerking to the left, and my brother says it could be one of a couple of things, but all of them end with the wheel locking up if I try to drive it. So, my boss was kind enough to change my schedule at work so that I could ride with another girl. Sadly, it takes away one of my days off and splits up the others. Not really a good sign. I can’t wait to buy a new car. We are going to do that this weekend or next.

Well, I am sorry for taking so long to post again, anything and everything is an effort these days. Your love and support is appreciated more then I can say.